Before you go to an event - especially a
professional or networking opportunity or any occasion where small talk is part
of the menu - prepare three different topics to start a conversation. Even if
you don’t use them, just knowing you have them will make you feel more
confident. This comes in really handy if you tend to have difficulty starting
conversations. So, here are some tips.
1. Select
your topics from a variety of categories: Think about being REAL (Customize for each event)
a. Reading
–on-line, newspapers, books, magazine articles, professional journals. Look for
current insights, challenges, trends and topics of interest to you and others.
b. Entertainment-
television/movies/theaters/museums/restaurants.
c. Activities – local/national events which you
either have attended or are considering.
d. Locale
– where you both are right now and what surrounds it nearby.
2. Set-up
a foundation (not disclosing anything which would put the other person ill at
ease, i.e. do not disclose too much!) before you introduce a topic. Be helpful
–provide context. Ask open-ended questions, invite a conversation.
·
(Reading) “I was reading about this ___ “(relate it to something you
are both then sharing.) “Turns out ___. What do you think?” At professional
events, research the speaker(s), their company, competition and current issues
in their industry!
·
(Entertainment/Activities)
“I just saw/went to ___ at ___. It was really remarkable. Did you get a chance
to see/go to it?”... “What was the last___ you saw?”
·
(Locale)”This place has really changed since I was here ___ ago. I
always love coming to the___, what do you think about it?”… “Have you been to
the ____shop around the corner? It’s great for ___.” (By acting like a host you
will be seen as a helpful resource.)
3. Always
stay positive. Your comments should be pleasant and upbeat.
4. An
exception to the three topics is during the “walk and small talk”- on the way
to the more formal interview- keep the conversation limited to
observational/complimentary topics:
“Thanks for the
opportunity to meet today/great directions/traffic was easy today getting
here.”
“What a great building/ nice reception
area/receptionist.” And if you get to their office look around and compliment
something specific. Always stay “in the moment.”
5. With
strangers, AVOD topics relating to politics, religion, controversial world issues,
sex or sexual orientation. The concept is to encourage conversation not
disputation. Do not lob a conversational bomb and wait to see it explode. Keep
it light and breezy and you will have good conversation coming back at you!
BTW, I still do this for each and every
event. Preparation can become a habit!
